Oh, hello! I think a wee dram of port is in order tonight.
Facebook? My Space? Twitter? Instant messaging? Is this really the way of the world? I joined MySpace about 2 years ago as a lark. I heard it was all the rage. Um, yeah, if you are a horny high school kid! I think I lasted about 6 months on that and then deleted my account because I felt so icky.
Next came Facebook. I joined that about a year ago. It seems to be a little better. I was able to connect with some people from high school. Although, now that I think of it, if I wanted to still be friends with the people I went to high school with, I probably would be. I have a feeling that most of them would probably feel the same way. I can see what people I work with are doing. But, again, do I really want to do that, either? I used FB quite regularly for a while, but then got bored with it. I know there are games that people love – bejeweled and mafia wars. One coworker has set up a bot at his house that keeps playing for him while he is at work. Really? Yikes. Now, I check in maybe once a week.
Twitter is one of the most addictive time sucks I have every come across. I joined Twitter in February of this year just to see what it was about. Like this blog, I started out slow. Then I got a few followers who seemed cool and now I’m addicted. I have “met” a whole community of people who are very similar to me. Whereas I often feel out of place around my job or family due to my snark and dry sense of humor, these folks take me as I am, and love me for it. One blessed, kind, sweet sole – who I won’t name our of respect for her privacy – has even offered to help me out of a recent financial situation. We have NEVER EVEN MET but she trusts me enough to be so selfless and generous. I declined her offer, but only because I find it so difficult to ask for and receive help. (That is a whole other blog post!)
Anyhoo. These three applications are called social media. But how, exactly, is this social? Sitting at a computer, chatting with people who may or may not be who they say they are. I don’t even have my real picture on Twitter. Or here. (That’s mostly because I HATE HATE HATE having my picture taken. I can fool myself in the mirror into thinking that I’m not as heavy as I am, but the camera doesn’t lie.) Honestly, I do try to be as much myself as possible, but I can’t say that about everyone.
I don’t know what the point of all this is. I guess that while I don’t quite get the “social” part of this, I am glad that I have the followers I have on Twitter. I believe them to be kind, real, friendly, and very supportive. I don’t believe there is any hidden agenda with any of the people I follow. It’s relaxing to me to be able to be myself. To be able to let my guard down because keeping it up all the time? EXHAUSTING!!
Oh, hello! Club soda with pom wonderful? Coming right up!
The twins have a very tough life. Really. It must be exhausting to be them.
Maggie want to go on a trip. But first….
…she wants to get her nails done. Then that is so exhausting…
…she has to curl into a micro-dot for a nap. Not to be outdone…
…Seamus wants to help me with the laundry as a way to make up for…
…needing to sleep off his hangover from the night before.
And of course, this is when they were getting along, napping together, and Mummy wouldn’t stop with the pictures. Maggie finally had to look back and ask me to stop. Seamus is looking very impressed, as well. *snort*
Oh, hello! Sapphire and tonic? With lime, of course.
I’m pretty sure there is no one on earth who hates house work more than I do. Well, except for those people on “Clean House” because that’s just gross. And okay, my neighbor, in the asbestos shingled, field for a lawn, use broken down minivans for storage (because that’s his “business” – selling cr@p at flea markets). And, okay, people who live like Deliverance folks.
Okay, whatever. Don’t get me off track. I get it. There ARE people who hate housework more than I. The point is that I hate it. HATE! I would love to hire someone to do it for me, but my house is so small that even I would feel guilty.
I think my family doesn’t like to come visit for very long because of my housekeeping skills. I mean, I don’t have rats or big giant bugs or anything. I did have ants, but only because I forgot to get the ant killer for the outside – and because the twins like to play in the garage, and I have to leave the door open so they can come in. But, my brother, Herb, even likes to say that I vacuum once a month, whether I need to or not. (So not true, but you get the point.)
Once year, Herb and his ex, Satan, were so sick of my dishes in the sink that they, along with my parents, bought me a dishwasher, and built an island for my kitchen to house said dishwasher and presented it to me for Christmas. (I cried. Don’t judge me.) (Related: I can never move now, because I love the island and the dishwasher, and I don’t want to leave it behind.)
I have gotten better though. I think I have the twins to thank for that too. Them and their black fur and their epic shedding abilities. It really is impressive how much they shed for such little bitty things. Alas, their fur is black (and white) and my carpets are beige, so frequent vacuuming is in order. The kitchen stays mostly clean. I think I have finally reached the responsible adult age that hits most people in their mid-twenties. Maybe I am just developmentally challenged.
OR, I am just lazy. I vote for the latter. I’m not going to win any awards, but I know I also won’t ever make it on to “Clean House”. And I’m more than okay with that.
Oh, hello! I have some lovely Raspberry Sangria Tea. Would you care for a cup?
What I learned on my summer vacation:
1. Seamus and Maggie like to sleep. ALOT!
2. Seamus and Maggie like to sleep ON ME.
3. I rather like the way I write.
4. I judge people too harshly at times.
5. Given the need, I can pull together a pretty good meal.
6. I really am one of the laziest people on the planet.
7. It’s time to take some bricks down from this wall I live behind.
8. I can live without coffee.
9. I wasn’t dreading the first day back at work as much as I thought I would.
10. Any day not at work is a good day.
Bring on my next vacation!! 5 weeks from now….
Hi kids…Sam’s out having lunch with Dad so I thought I’d drop by and fluff the pillows and open the curtains. I’m Moo…Sam has agreed to let me stop by every now and then and pontificate in her blog…(It’s not as dirty as it sounds, sicko!)
Let me tell you how Sam and I “met”. As you know, Sam is head Slurpee attendant at the Gas ‘n’ Sip. Well, I am the beer stock girl from the Beer Barn next door. And by next door, I mean about 2,000 miles to the left. You know how people in the same industry make connections…I think it’s called “networking”…
Anyway, Sam and I started cyber chatting about nothing. It was like a virtual Seinfeld episode. We managed to make a connection at least once a day to expound on absolutely nothing of relevance. But, after every time we made a connection, I knew I wanted to talk to Sam again. And over the course of several connections, Sam and I began to share things that weren’t all fluff and glitter. We shared some things that were real.
Now, with that said, we’d much rather prefer to discuss our disdain for Kate Goesslin’s bi level, multi striped, reverse mullet or our love for all things Jeffrey Donovan (you’d better believe that we have plans on how lure him into our lair should the situation present itself.) And we are not completely in agreement on everything in the world (I mean…who doesn’t watch Dancing with the Stars??? Get with the program, Sam!)
But what I know for sure, is that I am so glad that Sam is part of my life…even if it is only virtually. People don’t make organic connections as often in today’s world (Tell me…when was the last time you walked up to a stranger at Starbucks to discuss last night’s episode of “Castle”???) so it’s become quite normal to meet people online.
What’s amazing to me still is when you meet a person that is SO much like you…who holds so much draw…who you feel connected with from the word “hello”…that’s when you get lucky.
Anyway, Sam has introduced me to lots of cool stuff that I genuinely enjoy…I hope that one day I return the favor.
Make sure you lock up when you leave…can’t have weirdos in Sam’s place touching her MacGyver collectibles.
Oh, hello. Sorry about bitching, but there are just some things that bug me.
1. Bad grammar. Unless English is your second language, there is no reason to sound ignorant. If you only speak one language, perhaps you should LEARN TO SPEAK IT CORRECTLY!!!!
2. “Nother” IS NOT A WORD! Saying “That’s a whole nother matter”makes you sound like a moron.
3. “Have a good one”. Really? A good what? Orgasm? Bowel movement? Day in prison? Why don’t people say “Have a good day” anymore???? Day has the same number of letters. Same number of syllables. Have a good one just sounds lazy and slacker-like.
4. People on TV NEVER EAT a real meal. The women take these dorky little bites and mimic chewing like they are eating a burger in one bite. It’s annoying. I understand that they have lines to say, but it’s just stupid.
5. Restaurant food, as shown on TV, is never as appetizing when you go to the actual restaurant. It’s usually smaller and just thrown together.
6. People who insist on talking to you but never let you contribute to the conversation. Um, don’t ask me a question or try to engage me in conversation if I’m just expected to sit and listen and nod and look pretty. When I have a conversation, I like it to be 2 way. I may have something important to say – let me try.
okay. that’s enough complaining for today. tomorrow will be a whole nother story though. heheheh
Oh, hello. C’mere, I have a question for you.
Has this ever happened to you?
It’s a little chilly out so you have the windows closed. You need to take a shower.
You’re in the shower, doing your thing. Shampoo, shampoo, shampoo, lather, lather, lather. You know the shower is hot, but you ignore the steam. (BTW, you live alone so the bathroom door is open.)
Anyhoo. You’re just about to rinse and the steam sets off the smoke detector, located right outside the bathroom door. (Convenient, no?) Awwww, crap.
The cats, who are waiting patiently for you to finish so they can rub up against your legs and add hair to them, FREAK OUT! Tails puff, claws scrabble, fur flies.
You reach out from behind the curtain and try to open the window. You have soap running down your face, you grab the curtain to steady yourself, and WHOOSH! It comes down off the wall. MOTHER F@*#^@*(!
Okay, so you drop the curtain, and manage to get the window open to let the steam out. The cats are no where to be found. The smoke detector is still screeching, and the shampoo is now down to your shoulders. You grab a towel and start waving it frantically under the detector to get the screech to stop, water pooling at your feet.
The noise finally stops. You turn around, and see the shower water flowing nicely from the nozzle onto the bathroom floor. You now have shampoo in your eyes, burning. You have to get the shower curtain back up long enough to rinse and to stop the waterfall. You balance the curtain precariously on the edges of the shower and finish your toilette, only to step out and find the cats playing in the puddles. ::sigh::
So, no? This never happened to you? Just me? Huh…
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