Oh, hello! Come in. I made a full Irish breakfast for you today.
I just got back from Girls’ Weekend. What a blast!! But that’s not what I want to vent about today.
While I was away, I noticed something about myself that I don’t really like very much, so I want to change it.
At breakfast one morning, I was watching someone who was reading the Specials Board. She was complaining that something was “gross” and she couldn’t possibly eat it and she needed a menu instead. Whatever it was, it was something that she hadn’t tried before; yet she was sure it was gross and she wouldn’t like it and she couldn’t understand how anyone else could eat it.
So, full of righteous indignation, I turned to the K2Kid, with whom I was eating breakfast, and got myself all whipped up about what a jerk this girl was and why doesn’t she just try it and isn’t she just ridiculous.
Then I stopped.
And I caught what I was actually saying.
And I came to the realization that I was taking on the Judgey McJudgerson role. What the hell do I care if she doesn’t want to try something? How is her decision to NOT try something, in any way, shape or form, impacting me or my life, at all? Just because I am willing to try new things doesn’t make me better or worse (or anything else) than anyONE else. They like what they like and good for them.
I don’t like this superiority trait in myself. *I’m* the one who gets all whipped up. *I’m* the one who gets agita. *I’m* the only one who is negatively affected. The person, or situation, that I am judging, goes on about their business, happy as a lark, and none the wiser to my judgement. Who the hell do I think I am? There are SO MANY things about me that are available for judgement by others. Why don’t I focus on those things first? Get my own house in order, so to speak.
I asked the K2Kid to help me with this. I asked her to point out to me when I started to go off. There were a few times I caught myself before I went off. There were a few times she had to say to me “It doesn’t affect you” so that I would stop. It was eye-opening to me. And suitably humbling.
Change is hard.
Learning a new lesson is hard.
But I’m learning. It’s hard, but I’m learning.