Life thru the haze of cat hair.

Category Archives: 30 Days of Truth

Oh hello! Come in. I have new tea – white tea with peach and raspberry. It’s quite lovely.

Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something

I think the first thing that comes to mind was Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer. From

In Under the Banner of Heaven, Jon Krakauer tells the story of the killers and their crime but also explores the shadowy world of Mormon fundamentalism from which the two emerged. The Mormon Church was founded, in part, on the idea that true believers could speak directly with God. But while the mainstream church attempted to be more palatable to the general public by rejecting the controversial tenet of polygamy, fundamentalist splinter groups saw this as apostasy and took to the hills to live what they believed to be a righteous life. When their beliefs are challenged or their patriarchal, cult-like order defied, these still-active groups, according to Krakauer, are capable of fighting back with tremendous violence. While Krakauer’s research into the history of the church is admirably extensive, the real power of the book comes from present-day information, notably jailhouse interviews with Dan Lafferty.

Now, I understand that this is a fundamentalist group and that all Mormons are not represented by the group portrayed in this book.  And for the most part, my philosophy about what other people/groups/religions do is, whatever. If it isn’t hurting anyone else, let them do it.


My views were changed on polygamy because I think 13 or 14 year olds, and sometimes younger, should not be considered appropriate as wives for anyone. You know what? Marry whomever you want, as long as they are 18. Younger than that is too young.

This is my opinion. It may not agree with yours, but isn’t that wonderful? How boring life would be if we always agree.

So, yeah. This book changed my views on polygamy. My mind may not have slammed completely closed, but I think I may be less cavalier about it when hearing stories in the future.

Tomorrow: Your views on gay marriage.


Oh, hello! Come in. Have a big salad. It’s like a regular salad. But it’s in a big bowl. With a lot of stuff on it.

Today: Someone or something you definitely could live without

I could live without:

  • the constant barrage of celebrity “news”
  • the constant barrage of negativity from, about, and surrounding politicians
  • wet cake
  • fruit flavored beer
  • Oprah
  • profanity
  • obsession about weight and physical appearance
  • prejudice
  • hate

Tomorrow: a book you’ve read that changed your views on something

Oh hello! Come in and have a breakfast wrap.

Today: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Can I be honest? I’m a little bored with the 30 days of truth. I thought it would be more fun. But, in the interest of changing my habit of not following through with things, I will press on.

Today’s topic is stupid, IMO. We can all live without something. Whatever it is. Especially the “someone” you can’t live without. Yeah, you’d be sad, but you won’t die. You’d be devastated, but you won’t die. You’re life may never be the same, but you won’t die. If the Wonder Twins were taken away from me, permanently or temporarily, I would be sad. Despondent even. But I won’t die.

Maybe I’m not going deeply enough. Maybe I need to get more philosophical about this. Maybe I’m over thinking it.

Can I live without a fulfilling job? Yes. I do it every day.

Can I live without my cell phone? It would be a hassle, but yes. I could.

I can’t live without food. But that is too simplistic. As is living without air and water. I could live without chocolate. Or alcohol. Or coffee. Or more “stuff”. I have enough stuff.

I guess today’s topic is another “fail” as far as digging deep for a profound answer. But, my reality tells me that I won’t die because I’m deprived of something other than the basics.

Wait. Maybe *that* is the point of today’s question! Maybe it is designed to make you realize that you don’t need external “things” to be happy. You don’t need a partner to complete you. You are enough as you are. A partner is a wonderful addition, but won’t make you happy, in and of themself.  A new pair of shoes, while fabulous, won’t make you smarter or better or funnier or more loveable.

Jeepers. Did I just have a breakthrough??

Tomorrow: Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Oh, hello! Come in and have a slice of garlic and greek olive pizza. Yummers!

Today, I’m supposed to write a letter to a hero that let me down.

Hmmm. This is another one that I don’t think I’m going to be able to do, because as I know I have mentioned before, the only hero I have is Mum. And while we don’t always see eye to eye, she has never let me down.

Maybe if I considered Michael Vick a hero instead of an asshat, I could write a letter to him about how much of an asshat he is for abusing animals. Or if I thought Lindsey Lohan was a good role mod… BUAHAHAHAHHA. I’m sorry. I can’t even finish that statement.

But I don’t think of celebrities as role models or heroes. They are just people who get paid WAY too much money for what they do and then have every move dissected by the media.

No. Mum is my hero. And she always will be. Thank you for never letting me down, Mum. I love you.

Tomorrow: IDK – the list is way over there (*pointing*) but I’ll let you know when I get up.

Oh, hello! Come in and have a bowl of fresh fruit. It’s delicious.

Today: Write a letter to a band or artist that has gotten you through some tough a** days.

I’m having a hard time with this one, because I can’t think of a time when this has happened. Maybe I’ve lived a charmed life.

There was a time when I was around 18-ish when an ex died in a motorcycle accident. But that was 25 years ago. I don’t remember one band getting me through that.

Then there was a break up where I watched The Lion King over and over. (I don’t know why either.) Even my room-mate at the time was all “Oh god, this again??”

I like to listen to Pink when I’m stressed because she’s so kick a** that I feel empowered.

But, no, I’m going to have to not write a letter because this doesn’t apply to me.

Tomorrow: (Oy, another letter): A hero that has let you down

Oh hello! Come in. Have a scone and tea.

Today: Something you never get compliments on

One of the things I pride myself on is being a loyal and true friend. I may not trust easily, but once I do, and we are friends, I will have your back no matter what. Or until you prove yourself untrustworthy.

I think it’s very important to be a loyal friend. We all need someone we can turn to for help and comfort and advice. I’m good at being that person. And people come to me, frequently, to tell me things that are personal or private or that they just need to get off their chests. I’m more than happy to listen. They must recognize that I won’t tell their story. It’s not my story to tell.

But I think no one – and I’ve given this some thought – has ever complimented me on my loyalty and discretion. I have never had the “Golden Girls” theme song played in my honor. (Which, really, would be a little odd.) Sometimes, I admit, I feel a little taken-advantage-of. But for the most part? It’s an honor for me, acknowledged or not, to have these people come to me. Without saying it, I choose to believe that they know they can trust me. And maybe that is recognition enough.

Tomorrow: I am to write a letter to a band or artist that has gotten me through some tough a** days

Oh hello! We have a lovely selection of muffins today. The lemon poppy-seed is my favorite.

Today: Something people seem to compliment you the most on

Trying to sound really snotty here – there are SO many things! LOL!

I think people mostly compliment me on my hair. Or my eyes. Or my sense of humor. Or my generosity. Or my fashion sense. Like I said – it’s hard to pick just one.

No, really, it’s probably my sense of humor. People tell me I’m really funny. I’ve even been told I should do stand-up. Yeah, that’s never going to happen. But I do like making people laugh. It’s nice to bring a smile to someone’s face.

Tomorrow: Something you never get compliments on

Oh hello! Come on in and settle on the sofa. It’s a snuggle into the sofa kind of day. And here’s some soup.

Today’s task: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know

This is a tough one, because as I go through life and age like fine wine, I find myself saying goodbye to people frequently. I know that sounds cold and somewhat heartless, but it’s more for my own sanity than to be nasty.

I find that if I am stressed by the presence of someone, it’s better for me to distance myself from them, rather than try to develop a relationship that won’t be fulfilling for either of us. I won’t be putting my best foot forward for them, so they won’t have a chance to really know me. And I don’t want to know them, so it’s better to just walk away.

I’ve done that with a book club recently. One member was, in my opinion, very mouthy and superior and opinionated, and I was feeling cowed by her. I didn’t enjoy going to meetings. So, I opted to leave the group.

Perhaps it would have been more beneficial to stay with the group and make it a project to get to know this woman and find out why she is the way she is. It would have been a growth experience. Who knows. Maybe she would have been my new BFF.

But no. I would rather drift away from situations and live a quiet and simple existence. That works for me.

Tomorrow: Something people seem to compliment you the most on

Oh, hello! Come in. Have a donut.

Who did I not mean to let go of but they just drifted away….

I guess that would be either my friend Michelle. Or the Sister.

I met Michelle about 12 years ago. She was strong and made friends with me at a time when I was alone and needed a friend. She was kind and adventurous and encouraging. She didn’t judge me for anything. When I moved home to Maine, we drifted. At first slowly and more recently almost completely. I miss her, but we now have different interests.

The Sister and I have also drifted. We see each other at holidays and might speak once or twice a year about our parents, but other than that, nothing. We have almost nothing in common any more other than being related.

I don’t like regrets but sometimes that is what I feel. I think people are in our lives for a reason and, like the tide, they drift in and out as appropriate. I will be forever grateful to Michelle for all she did for me. And I will be forever related to the Sister so in some way, she will always be in my life in some ways. And these won’t be the last people to drift away from me. I’m okay with that. It’s normal.

Tomorrow: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know

Oh hello! Come in. We’re having a burger with sweet potato fries.

Who made my life hell?

All the girls in high school. I was a brainy nerd in high school. All the “cool” girls who were not as smart and played the “cool” sports – basketball, field hockey – looked down on me, made fun of me, picked on me and made my life generally miserable.

I made it easier for them. I didn’t have the internal fortitude to stand up to them. I never fought back.

I read something that said by the time you turn 30, you should forgive the mean girls in high school. I didn’t like high school. I didn’t go to my reunion because of those girls. I want nothing to do with them.

But it is time to forgive them. I didn’t make it by 30, but it’s time. It’s also time to forgive myself for allowing it to happen.

I will leave that behind me and move on.

Tomorrow: Someone you didn’t want to let go of but just drifted