Oh, hello! Come in and make yourself a sandwich.

I took a few days off from work last week to just chill and sleep. I’ve been busy (for me) the past few weeks, and wanted some time to sit and do nothing. As a result, I ended up watching more television than I normally do. Not the best use of my time, I know, but I did, so let’s move on.

What I have noticed about television is that the advertisers must think we, collectively, are dumb as a pile of hair. The ads shown, regardless of the time of day, the station, the program, are insipid crap. I understand that networks need advertisers to pay the bills. I get that. And I also get that having a DVR-type technology available means that advertisers need to work harder to make an impression so that people don’t fast forward through them, but come on! Obviously, I can’t speak for anyone else, but if the advertisers spent a little time coming up with thoughtful and well executed ads, I might watch them.

Some examples? Anything by Burger King. That “king” is terrifying. He makes me think of a pedophile every time I see him. I’m pretty sure that is *not* the image the company wants to put out there. Yeah, I remember it, but for all the wrong reasons. Also the kid with the small hands. WTF?

How about the phone company, and to be honest with you, I have no idea which one it is, that has Flava Flav on it. Um, really? You couldn’t get anyone more relevant? You had to pick the least attractive “star”?

And any of the weight-loss pill ads. I don’t mean Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers. I mean those “You take this pill and you will lose 90 pounds in 2 weeks” ads. The women on these ads, who now claim to be able to strut around in a bikini, ARE ALREADY THIN! Show me someone realistic.

Again, I get it. The company has 30-60 seconds to get their message across, so it needs to be memorable. But, should the ads be SO dumb, SO inane that we remember them for the WRONG points? We (America) are not a stupid culture. (Sure, there are stupid people *in* the culture, but that’s not exclusive to America!)  Why do these advertisers think it is okay to treat us like we are stumps in a forest?

C’mon, advertising companies! I challenge you to stop dumbing down your material. I challenge you to speak to us like we have brain cells. Until then, I guarantee, DVR use is going to skyrocket.

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